I have never heard anyone speak so positively about being wrong. And when I think about the points Kathryn Shulz said in her Ted talk (see here: http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/eng/kathryn_schulz_on_being_wrong.html), I marvel that this simple idea has never struck me. I have been brainwashed into thinking that being wrong is the worst possible thing that could happen to me, that making mistakes is taboo and a huge social faux pas, no-no.
I still haven't quite wrapped my head around the idea that I will be happier and more successful if I step outside of myself and see that I don't know everything, and instead of fearing my lack of knowledge, embrace it and doing my best to understand what previously I avoided. That concept hasn't sunk in yet. I agree with everything she said; we are all "self-absorbed," in a sense. We all see through rose-colored glasses, we all have our "belief windows" we see the world through. What we don't realize is that if we move away from the window and open a door, we can experience the world instead of watching it from behind glass. Out there we're more vulnerable, it's true; out there we might realize that we are wrong and with that comes all of those yucky feelings we try to avoid by convincing ourselves that we are right. But if we can move past that, if I can move past those feelings, then maybe I can focus more on how to change. And maybe, just maybe, I'll be more able to see mistakes coming and have time to stop before my feet lose ground like Shulz's example of Wiley Coyote.
It was unsettling for me to hear what she said about feelings. To paraphrase, she said, "Trusting too much in feeling can be very dangerous...our internal sense of rightness is not a reliable guide," I'm still not sure I understood what she meant exactly, but in my LDS-oriented mind my faith was somewhat shaken. My faith in my own faith, so to speak. Because if I can't rely on myself, what can I rely on? My first thought is God. Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are perfect, and through the Holy Ghost I can hear and understand what they speak to me. And perhaps I am so caught up in what I think and "know" and believe that I can't hear what they, perfect, omnipotent beings are saying to me. And many would argue that, even if I do receive some kind of "inspiration" that I consider coming from a deity in heaven, it is still my own belief, my own idea of this God that is guiding me, not the actual God. I don't believe that. I do believe in God, and while my interpretation of God's will for me is not perfect, it is enough, I think, to help me accomplish all I am meant to do in this life.
And mistakes are part of that life. An important, invaluable part. I won't say my father taught me this, exactly, although I have vague memories of him guiding me to the realization that I'm going to make mistakes, so I might as well get back on my feet and do my best to fix it.
Shulz mentioned the possibility of preventing the mistake, of catching it before it is committed, but I am still not convinced that this is desirable. Mistakes make me, and not making them is good (obviously, since God is perfect), but I don't think I'm capable of not making mistakes. I guess by embracing mistakes I can recognize them and gain deeper understanding of myself and the way the world works. I guess I'm rambling and I'm not sure what to say next. One thing that I will do after listening to this Ted talk is "entertain the possibility that I might be wrong" a little more often, and at least see where it leads me.
In closing, two quotes that intrigued me:
"The miracle of your mind is not that you can see the world as it is; it's that you can see the world as it isn't."
Fallor ergo sum "I err, therefore I am."
A feast for thought, that's for certain. Sorry for the long response; I'm a novelist like that. ;)
No comments:
Post a Comment